You know, we thought, it might not be such a bad idea to take a Christmas off once in a while. There’s no doubt you will appreciate it better when you get back — as you will see.

About that time I was resorting to just throwing everybody’s presents in a lawn and leaf garbage bag with a ribbon tied around the top, calling it good enough. It occurred to me that this was getting ridiculous! What happened to the point? Isn’t it supposed to be a few homemade-with-loving-care things, a feast and good cheer all around? That concept got lost somewhere, so let’s get out of the rat race once and see what it’s like. Christmas away.

We decided to go to the mountains since we hadn’t been there in a while. I got some brochures about a resort — we might as well go in style — and made reservations for a Christmas Eve and the following Christmas Day. We rented a van, packed our stuff and set off in the cold and snow.

It’s a pleasant drive to the mountains, winding around Maine lakes, and it doesn’t take long. We arrived late afternoon and were dazzled by all the Christmas decorations. There were lights everywhere on the trees, houses, bridges and gazebos. This resort went right up the side of a mountain and looked beautiful.

I went to check in, and was told we’d have to make a $150 “damage” deposit — on top of the $120 a night the room cost. A case of “guilty until proven innocent,” which didn’t sit well at all. Being already there, and reluctant to turn around and go home, we grudgingly made the deposit. This resort was a complex of condos rented out when the owners weren’t there — paranoid owners, apparently.

Our lodging was at the very top of a steep slope, after passing through a guarded gate (worse and worse!). We drove up there and discovered we were on the third and top floor of the building. A spectacular view. It was only one room — a bedroom with a giant bed and a tiny fireplace and a bath with a Jacuzzi for two. It’s not hard to imagine what went on here! There was a balcony, a closet, a small corner for a fridge and coffee pot, and a dresser.

We lugged our gear up the three flights of stairs and settled in. Dinner reservations were next. We just squeaked in at the last minute; lucky for us. The mountains are crowded in the winter.

So far, so good. We had a delicious dinner in an old, quaint tavern in town and returned to our mountain retreat to relax. We wanted a fire in the fireplace and noticed an outbuilding filled with wood when we came in. I went down to get some and found the building locked! I called the office and they sent someone with a key to our own wood locker. They lock it up at night so no one will come steal it. Sure — someone’s going to get past that guard and drive all the way to the top of the mountain to steal wood with a whole state full of wood around them.

We got the wood and lugged it upstairs. It was wet and half rotten to boot. We had a struggle getting the fire going and then nearly got smoked out. The fireplace was little more than a thin, tinny insert in a decorative surround with a flimsy chimney pipe. We got it going after a while and went to soak in the Jacuzzi, a pleasant end to a half-mad day.

We woke up the next day to a blizzard, which poured down snow on the several feet on the ground. Oh, great, I guess we’re not going to do any sightseeing in this. I wonder if any restaurants are open? Nope. None. Closed for the holiday. Everyone wants to be with their family today. So what are we doing to do for Christmas dinner?

The snow let up after a while, leaving a sparkling, pristine beauty when the sun came out. We took a drive around and came upon an open convenience store. Aha — dinner! By then we were getting pretty hungry (never go in a store when you’re hungry!) and came out of there with $70 worth of hot dogs, sandwich meats, bread, condiments, chips, cheese, sweets and drinks. While we were there we got a couple of bundles of dry firewood too. I bet we’ll get that fireplace going with this!

We went back to our room, got a roaring fire going (wondering if we were going to burn the place down in the process) and proceeded to cook hot dogs over the flames. A pretty state of affairs for Christmas dinner, especially when we started thinking about the wonderful feast we would be having at home, if only we’d been smart enough to stay there!

That evening some friends found out we were there and took pity on our loneliness away from our family. They came with some quickly conjured up gifts to cheer us up (and we gifted them with our bulging box of leftover food). We had some beer on the deck — icy cold, pleasant talk and a breathtaking view. The sky was crystal clear, filled with millions of brilliant stars, and moonlight shone on the fallen snow lying on every tree and twig, every roof and road. A moment of pure beauty and bliss, but only a moment!

The next morning we got up and got in the Jacuzzi one more time. The old man got a towel to dry off, strolled into the bedroom, picked up a card on the dresser, read it and roared! What now? The last straw. The management wanted their guests to know there will be a $20 fine for every stolen towel. The old man was so incensed at this slur on his (and everyone else’s) integrity that he grabbed a pencil and left them an unmentionable note, and no tip for the maid. Hurry up with that packing, we’re getting out of here NOW and going home. So much for Christmas away.

We got home to find that the family had a second Christmas waiting for us. They had put up a tree, there were presents under it (not homemade, perhaps, but given with love nonetheless), a feast was in the oven, and good cheer was all around, just the way it should be. Christmas away was a cold substitute for the warmth of our family together. That’s live and learn — and believe me, we did.

With best wishes for a merry Christmas and a happy new year to all.

— Rusty Warren

Vinalhaven